I was roaming the mountains, deserts, forests and beaches (specifically, the beaches of Alibag) in search of the Truth. I was looking at the Murud Janjira fort, built by an Abyssinian pirate named Siddhi Johar and reflecting on what lured pirates to travel thousands of miles an build forts in the middle of the sea, when He came and told me, “Libertarians are fighting”
“But You don’t exist” I said.
“Assume that I do and focus on the content of what I said”
“Assumed. Libertarians are always fighting. They have this illusion that the right way to reach the truth is to argue among themselves. They know not of the Truth that can be obtained from reflection, meditation and…”
“Shut up. The High Council of the Cartel has been attacked by another libertarian for being insufficiently libertarian”
“What is it to me? And please don’t call it the High Council. I am tired of explaining to people that Marijuana consumption before Council meetings is not really mandatory”
“Don’t change the subject. Go back to your calling. You must come to the defence of the Cartel. Use your enormous powers of reasoning, your capacity for razor-sharp analysis and your ability to…”
“Cut it out. I get it. I’ll do it, but I’ll tell everyone that You made me do it”
“That’s okay. I’m always doing these things. Why some time back, I motivated a guy to fight and kill a lot of people even though he didn’t want to”
So that’s my excuse. He made me write what I am going to write after this commercial break
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