This post is dedicated to Bernard Woolley, the lovable pedant who is the Private Secretary to the Principal Secretary to Jim Hacker, the minister for Administrative Affairs in Yes Minister
He is the one responsible for such immortal lines as

Jim Hacker: “Now about nailing that leak…”
Bernard Woolley: “I’m sorry to be pedantic, but if you nail a leak you make another.”

If you haven’t read Yes Minister, as opposed to watching it on TV, you haven’t lived

I wonder what he’d say about these poor abused metaphors:

There can be many a slip between the cup and the lip before the last word is said on the privatisation of public sector oil refining and retailing companies, the Hindustan Petroleum (HPCL) and the Bharat Petroleum (BPCL) corporations.(Sand in oil divestment – Indian Express)
Try not to have the last word in an argument while sipping a cup of coffee…

There’s more:
Sitting on an empire of patronage, few ministers want to hack the branch they are perched on.
Where are they sitting on?

I guess this is why George Orwell warned long back:
“Never use a metaphor, simile, or other figure of speech which you are used to seeing in print. “